Sunday, April 01, 2007

April Fool.......


Old Lady in Court

Defense Attorney: Will you please state your age?"

Little Old Lady: "I am 86 years old."

Defense Attorney: "Will you tell us, in your own words what happened the night of April 1st?"

Little Old Lady: “There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.'

Defense Attorney: "Did you know him?"

Little Old Lady: "No, but he sure was friendly."

Defense Attorney: "What happened after he sat down?”

Little Old Lady: "He started to rub my thigh."

Defense Attorney: "Did you stop him?"

Little Old Lady: "No, I didn't stop him."

Defense Attorney: "Why not?"

Little Old Lady: "It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Abner died some 30 years ago."

Defense Attorney: "What happened next?"

Little Old Lady: "He began to rub my breasts."

Defense Attorney: "Did you stop him then?"

Little Old Lady: "No, I did not stop him."

Defense Attorney: "Why not?"

Little Old Lady: "His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!"

Defense Attorney: "What happened next?"

Little Old Lady: Well, by then, I was feeling so "spicy" that I just laid down and told him "Take me, young man. Take me!"

Defense Attorney: "Did he take you?"

Little Old Lady: "Hell, no! He just yelled, April Fools And that's when I shot him, the little bastard."

I absolutely forgot today was April Fool's Day until I saw this joke from the plethora of jokes on Jokemail. I didnt play any tricks on anyone and its too late now. *sob, sob* Oh well, next year, I must play some tricks on someone.

The next joke is also culled from Jokemail too and I couldnt resist sharing it with you guys:

TIMEKEEPING

A priest was being honored at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A leading local politician and member of the congregation was chosen to make the presentation and give a little speech at the dinner. He was delayed, so the priest decided to say his own few words while they waited."I got my first impression of the parish from the first confession I heard here. I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first person who entered my confessional told me he had stolen a television set and, when questioned by the police, was able to lie his way out of it. He had stolen money from his parents, embezzled from his employer, had an affair with his boss's wife, taken illegal drugs, and gave VD to his sister. I was appalled. But as the days went on I knew that my people were not all like that and I had, indeed, come to a fine parish full of good and loving people."Just as the priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies at being late. He immediately began to make the presentation and gave his talk. "I'll never forget the first day our parish priest arrived," said the politician. "In fact, I had the honor of being the first one to go to him in confession."

15 comments:

  1. now thats an excellent April Fools Day Hoaxe!

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  2. FUNNY!!!
    Insanity has always been a good defense!!

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  3. lmao@ the second joke!!!! Thanks fo radding me to your roll btw. cheers.

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  4. Trust me. I didn't miss it. I had people looking like fools after pulling a fast one on them.

    How have you been?

    Happy new month.

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  5. My professor tried to do "April fool" for us today during his sunday review session...I even forgot this day existed...lolll...

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  6. excellent, just excellent!!!! wish i had someone to fool yesterday

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  7. lol.. funny! my cab driver told me that my journey from startford to barking cost £20 pounds.. so i said April fool right ( shinning teeth).. the guy said.. NO, pay up!

    have a wonderful April.. mwahxx

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  8. lolllllllllllll!!funny jokes, is it 2 late 2 still fool sum1??

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  9. lmao...that was funny abeg...dont kill us oh!

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  10. These jokes are toom much. Thanks for posting them..

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  11. that was funny! some guy tried to fool me, sent me fake recharge card numbers. i didn't even try them,and let him know! then he confessed. free credit? as if! in these hard times!
    other than that though it was very uneventful.

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  12. Oh! mt gawd.Now, thats one helluva a confession! Wonder how da priest gonna take the revelation...lol

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  13. Why did you miss the D day when you 've gat some funny catch with you. Nways, next year is around the corner.

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  14. That was a very funny and nice1. Nice and interesting blog. keep up the gud wuk!!!!!!!

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